It happens to all of us at some time in our lives. Criticism. How we dress. Act. Eat. Sleep. Chew our gum. Wear our hair. Write. Somebody’s going to have an unfavorable opinion. What’s that saying, “We can’t please everyone, all the time?” Yeah. That. When we choose to live in a way that puts us out in front … Read More
The Rebirth of a Marriage
Journeyers, I think we’re going to be okay, Warren and me. It’s been a tough ride, hasn’t it? And if I haven’t successfully conveyed to you how much I appreciate you here, whoever you are, wherever you are following and watching from, please know that you and this space has been invaluable to me. I’ve always written through and … Read More
On Second Chances and Doing Things Twice
I had an epiphany while showering this morning. The good kind of awakening, one that softens our grief and helps pave the way to peace and acceptance. As the spray washed over me I thought about a conversation Warren and I had earlier this week. How I despise doing things twice. Again, came to mind, followed by a series of … Read More
Something Old, Something New, Something…Shiny
Where to BEGIN?! I guess with this. Warren and I had a week without any fights, without any SUPER H…E…A…V…Y… conversations, a week without Tension. I think we’re going to be alright, I first realized and then said to him, as we chuckled over some random inside joke. And I hate to admit this, but guess what? I wasn’t all … Read More
The (Not-So) Perfect Day
I’ve never really paid much attention to the cards hanging on my therapists’ waiting room fridge. Until today. Today these simple words drew me in. “What is your perfect day?” somehow filled me up, expanded my rib cage and my lungs and my heart and my head with promise and contentment and a sense of pleasure. But right now, after … Read More
Our Roots
“This is the hard work of marriage,” I said to Warren. We were sitting on our deck steps, arguing the way we’ve argued for twenty-some years. Streams of snot and tears ran down my face. “The easier thing to do would have been to say ‘Fuck YOU,’ and leave,” Warren. “The easier thing would be to bury our heads … Read More
Two Things
Dear Journeyer,Though this message was originally written with a single individual in mind, it applies for each and every one of us… I can’t seem to get enough of your writing. And, honestly, I just can’t shake you, or you and Hubby, or you and your beautiful little family from my mind. Last week I was moved to write you … Read More
I Could Use a Friend (or seven) Right About Now
Journeyers, I need you right now. A couple of weeks ago, something inside of me broke. And instead of trying to fix it, I buried it. I went on weekend trips with Warren and pretended to myself and him and the world around us that we were happy. That I was happy holding his hand and standing by his side. … Read More
I Have a Confession, and a Secret Stash
Journeyers, I have a confession. After Warren’s last affair I began piling away a secret stash. Cold hard cash that no one knows about but me. No one. Well, I guess given that declaration, no one but all of you, my fellow Journeyers… I can thank my lucky stone that there aren’t too many of you, huh? I hid it … Read More
I’m Sad
Two days ago I was so mad it gave me a rare, pounding headache. The kind that makes your eyes bulge and your entire body hurt. And last night I was the kind of sad that brings giant crocodile tears. The kind that builds towers out of snotty tissues. I’m sad because I realized, yesterday, for the first time … Read More