You know that person who seems to sparkle and shine? They ooze confidence in everything they do, from navigating a room, to the image of them staring back from the screen or photo in front of you.

How on Earth do they do that? How on Earth can I do that? you might ask.

It is true that some people are born comfortable in front of a camera or a crowd, but I have come to learn that just as many people are not innately cozy in those settings.

For years, people have commented on how easily I meet and engage with new people, and many more have remarked how seemless my TEDx talk and other presentations seemed to flow.

I am going to let you in on a big secret, Neighbor: NONE of that is natural for me. Put me in a crowd where I know no one and Small Talk is the main course of conversation? I literally want to disappear into the woodwork! Put me in front of a camera and I get all awkward and squeamish. Having been subconscious about my body for my entire life, I learned a trick from an old friend. She would literally place herself behind another person and poke her head out from the side. What a great way to hide, I thought, and for years I followed her format.

I began to realize that hiding parts of me were not only adding to my discomfort, I was also blocking the parts of me that I loved from being ever present and seen, which drastically diminished my confidence.

Here are five, simple tips to help you create the confidence you want for yourself.

Surround yourself with people who make you feel good.
Being in the company of like-minded people and/or those who make you feel good is a great way to build confidence in day-to-day situations.

If the thought of professional headshots or film footage makes you wince, find a photographer whose images resonate with you. I recently booked an entire photo shoot for my buisness and, having someone who made me feel comfortable, helped bring out the absolute best in me.

Oh, and one more thing…it is seldom a single photo that captures your essence. Photographers take countless photos before landing on the “one” that has all the right elements…lighting, angle, your posture, and that one frame that brings it all together!

Set small, achievable goals.
Set one “big” goal for your day, and one or two easier tasks. There are differing thoughts on whether to go after the more complex objective or the smaller ones first, but do not let that stop you. Pick one. If the more involved target has many elements, try breaking it down into smaller, more manageable pieces.

Be sure to celebrate each win!!! Pat yourself on the back. Do a little dance. You earned it!

Step outside of your comfort zone.
Eleanor Roosevelt is quoted as saying, “Do one thing every day that scares you.”

If initiating conversation is hard, start by saying ‘Hello’ to someone you pass in the hall or on the street.

Camera shy? Take a bunch of selfies! Be funny; stick your tongue out. Move around different lighting and try different camera angles. Save your favorite one! And smile! The first time I took a bunch of selfies, I felt silly, and yet, I enjoyed feeling more comfortable with each one and with each time I did this. Now I am more comfortable when students ask me to take pictures with them or when I am in front of a camera.

Dress confidently.
Lisa Bilyeu, Women of Impact podcast host and author of the bestselling Radical Confidence, talked in one discussion about how she is deliberate in her choice of clothing, jewelry, and shoes on the day she films or does interviews. She selects items that make her feel radically confident, which then builds on itself. As she puts each piece on, she allows herself to step more deeply into that state of confidence.

Practice.
My TEDx talk, The Power of ‘What if?’ to Heal Grief? I had nearly one-hundred hours in writing, re-writing, and practicing every aspect of that speech inside and out. This is one of the top tips for presenters: Know your material. The same holds true for anything you want to do.

Any time you try something new, it can feel scary, yet each time you repeat it, you are informed by your previous experience, which tends to make things run more smoothly the next time. We also tend to learn what we do want by experiencing what we do not. Look objectively at something you would like to change, make a plan, and then try, again.

What are your favorite strategies for creating confidence, Neighbor? Share in a comment below! Someone out there needs to hear it!