I opened my eyes for the last time at 9:22 this morning.
I’d woken a few times, alert only enough to realize that Warren had crawled back into bed to cuddle, and when I heard Big Guy’s footsteps on the stairs.
“Good morning. Have fun at practice,” I said before falling fast asleep again.
But when I heard Warren’s truck start and crunch on the drive’s gravel as he left for work, I knew I’d slept far later than I’d ever imagined.
With fatigue still beckoning me back to bed, I forced myself to hit the ground moving.
Now 10:43, I’ve made the bed, showered and dressed, eaten breakfast and transferred this week’s happy images from my handy dandy iPhone to my computer.
I’ve brushed my teeth, my hair and swept the crumbs from my English muffin off the countertop.
Normally, I’d be wide awake and ready to tackle the day, but even as I sit here and type, an overwhelming fatigue beckons me back to slumber’s darkness.
Today is August 3, the early stages of a new month.
And for me, that always means raging hormones that wreak havoc on my body.
A hysterectomy ended a ghastly flow that paralleled that of Niagara Falls.
Okay, so that’s a bit of an exaggeration; it was more like the currents of its counterpart, the Bridal Veil Falls.
The doctors had been telling me for years that my blood pressure spikes had nothing to do with my menstruation, but I knew better after tracking it for three years.
I felt some better, now that I wasn’t bleeding damn near to death three or four days out of each month, and I thought I’d feel even better after I had my right ovary removed.
Once the doc went in, she discovered why I’d been having those “tugging sensations,” as that little body part had fused itself solid to my uterine wall.
Alas, every once in a while, and around that time of the month, I am still plagued by exhaustion, crankiness, and other bizarre bodily issues like diarrhea.
All attributed to my womanhood.
As I’ve struggled through the tiredness, each and every day, I’ve also been analyzing it…
Certainly, certainly, this is not the time for me to be trying to solve life’s complexities and ironies, not the time for me to be dwelling on that which drives individuals to say one thing and do another, not the time for me to be analyzing why people lie and cover things up, or why people can call themselves friend and yet are unsupportive and indifferent, it’s not the time for me to be wondering why I can’t let go of the desire to hang on to those people, it’s not the time for me to be expecting to solve the strife that weaves itself in and out of the marital veil, and it’s definitely not the time for me to be musing about why parenting can be so freaking hard at times…
Now that our travels have slowed, my mind has been running rampant with those thoughts, with ideas for The Five Facets, and with a longing to exercise my brain in ways I’m not able to do (as often as I’d like) during the school year.
I’ve gone back to writing three times a week, a training ritual that always feeds my happy organ!
I’ve been finding and reading and connecting with new people like Jennifer over at The Deliberate Mom, who wrote this fabulous pieceabout the personal connections we make through this wonderful world of blogging.
I was able to reconnect with one of my earliest blogging world friends, who dishes up the most diverse selection of food for thought and fodder found on the internet. The timing of this week’s piece, If you’re not part of the solution, was like a little dose of anecdotal therapy.
And I had a deliciously real-life tête-ê-têtewith a girlfriend I haven’t seen IRL for far too long.
Mouthwatering, blackened, grilled haddock
And now, as I stare at the week’s photos, trying to pull something that links my happy moments together, I realize that this week’s theme seemed to be all about connections.
I ended last week by gathering with friends and will end this week by going to dinner and a movie with Warren and Big Guy and Beauty.
The True Blood glass my friend gave me
Imagine these words are photos of our Olive Garden dinner and theater experience!
Relationships are vital to my existence, be they bonds with the universe…
Hummingbirds regularly alight on this post outside of my office window, before dropping down to drink
The beginning and ending of a rainbow that appeared during one of Big Guy’s soccer matches
…bonds with others…
Big Guy and I had lunch at Panera Bread, where I had this delicious salad…
out on their terrace…
where we had fun watching these little birds who were waiting for crumbs…
Warren and I watched one of Fave’s fellow teammates compete at the Crossfit Games, where he came in second!
Warren and Big Guy helped me pick out a new bike!
While shopping, I spotted this red grill, which reminded me of Auntie Squirrel from Salt Lake City, who has a house full of red appliances and accessories
…bonds with myself…
Cooler weather always draws me into the kitchen, where I love whipping up a homemade meal!
Homemade chicken Alfredo in my new James Burke stoneware bowls
I made two batches. One for us and one for a friend who’s been sick. The gift of giving always feeds my happy!
Writing…reading…riding my new bicycle…and a little pampering with a haircut and some fabulous new shampoo. Just love Paul Mitchell products!
…or bonds with that jar of honey roasted peanuts that somehow manages to carry me through those days of hormonal surge…
You know what I say: Just like the proverbial shit happens, happy happens. It’s right in front of us, waiting for us to give it a front row seat in our lives!
What about you? What Moment(s) fed your happy this week?
What about you? What Moment(s) fed your happy this week?
Yours in healing, hope, and happiness,
~AE